Author: Taylor Schae

My husband and I started sleep training our daughter after a stressful night of waking up several times to a crying daughter. Just hearing her make any sort of noise was sending sheer panic down my spine, and I knew it was time to help Isla sleep through the night!

Ideally we would’ve started sleep training her around the 6 month mark, but because of her still needing nightly feedings on demand (due to low BMI) and living in a one bedroom apartment, we couldn’t begin this process until she was closer to 8 months old.

We moved into our new house just before Christmas, and I couldn’t have been more excited to set up Isla’s very own bedroom so that she could sleep in it that first night. Because she had been in a bassinet and never really liked sleeping in a pack n play, I was nervous as to how she would enjoy her crib. When her bedtime came around, we put her in the crib, and after going in a couple times to help her settle in, she fell asleep in her big girl room! But a few hours later she woke up and started crying…loudly. The kind that lets you know that she’s not just going to give up any time soon. After feeding her, she went back down to sleep. A few hours later, it was another trip back into her room for her Tylenol and Benadryl cocktail.

Morning came around way too soon, and I started off my day feeling exhausted. The following nights looked very similar, so it was no surprise to me that I broke down one night when she started crying right when I had gone to bed. My husband and I decided to start sleep training our daughter the next night. There wasn’t a magic formula to it, we just put her down to bed, she fell asleep, and when she would wake up, whether it be 30 min or 5 hours later, we let her cry it out. We thought this would be so hard on us to hear her cry and even starting with 5 minutes of crying it out can feel like a lot. We were so surprised, however, when she went back to sleep after crying for just a couple minutes! It was like a whole other world opened up to us when we realized that we didn’t need to go check on her every time she made a peep.

Fast forward over a month later, and all of us are much better off after sleep training! There are still ups and downs of course, and not every night is perfect, but the overall application of letting our baby cry it out for a few minutes before checking on her allowed her to learn self soothing, and this well-rested momma is a testament to it!

Side Note: In my opinion, a lot of factors can go into sleep training. If there are any details unclear or if you have any questions or comments on what worked for you, please leave a comment!

How does everyone do Christmas when they have littles that have specific nap/bedtimes? I’m so glad we survived our first Christmas with a child—I really wasn’t sure how it would go! Isla went to bed past her bedtime probably 4 nights out of the past week. She would get a little fussy, but as long as I was holding her or playing with her, she stayed overall in a pleasant mood.

That leads me to another question. When you have extended family in town, do your babies let others hold them? I think Isla is going through separation anxiety in general, but if it even looked like someone other than me was going to hold her, she would immediately start puckering her lips about to cry. WHY? I know it’s just a phase, but it can be tough during the holidays when there are so many family members that want to hold her and give me a little bit of a break! I look forward to next year when she hopefully will go to more people.

Overall, seeing my daughter get so many presents and be around her whole family this Christmas was so special for me as her mom. She even started getting the hang of opening presents! A super fun present we found out as well is that she will be going on a Disney cruise in February!! I am so stinking excited!! What was your favorite gift that your child got this year?

Moms out there, I need your help! I’m starting to come face-to-face with a depressing reality. Outside of being a mom, I don’t know what I like to do, what I want to do, what my style is, or even where to start. I feel so lost! I wish I would’ve known myself more before having my baby. I wish I would’ve taken more risks and pursued more things outside of my comfort zone before becoming a mom because now I feel like I can’t.

Have any of you moms out there been through this? What helped for you? I love being a SAHM, I don’t think that the solution is for me to put her in daycare and go back to work. But I feel like there is something else that could be implemented to help me begin going through these mental and emotional blocks that I feel I have. I feel like my hair, skin, and makeup don’t even reflect me anymore. I feel like I’m putting out there a version of me that seems half put together and like I’m in survival mode. Now that my daughter is almost 8 months old, it’s definitely more than time to put some effort into myself so that I can be a good example for my daughter as someone who is sure of herself and confident instead of apologetic when entering a room.

I can’t wait to hear from you all! Thanks in advance for your feedback!

I know she is only 7 months old, but any other mommas out there relate when I say that there’s just a way your child looks at you and interacts with you that makes you feel like you are the best of buddies? I’ve been feeling that way with my daughter lately and it makes being a stay-at-home mom such a blast. We will be on the floor playing and she will give me a look that just stops me in my tracks. She trusts me so much and it’s such an exciting and terrifying feeling all at once. My Isla girl, your mom is so in love with you. So is your dad-we can’t leave him out! But I’ll say there’s no denying the special bond that I have with my daughter. It can make separation anxiety a real thing (LOL!) but I wouldn’t trade each and every day with her for anything. People tried to to explain to me the love you have for your child before my daughter was born, and being able to hold, feed, care for, and love this child far surpasses what I could have even imagined. I’m so grateful to God for this blessing.

The other day was not my best by far. I was tired, short-tempered, and easily irritable. Most days I feel like this, but I have been working on really trying to change my outlook and attitude when feeling that way so that I can be the best wife and mom to my family. However, Isla was super fussy so I thought I’d go ahead and give her a bottle. When sitting her on my lap, she started bucking and crying. My short fuse was lit and I said, “shut up, shut up!” Ross heard me say this and reminded me that we don’t talk that way towards or in front of her, even if she is 7 months old and doesn’t know what we are saying yet. I know that is true, and I immediately wanted to take back the words that were said, but I couldn’t. What I could do though was apologize. A little while later, it was her nap time, and I decided to lay in my bed with her. We were staring at each other, and I was overcome again with regret that I let my temper snap in front of my sweet daughter who had done nothing wrong. I verbally told her I was sorry for telling her to shut up, and that may seem unnecessary because she doesn’t understand, but it’s good practice for me. I want to be so quick to apologize because I know that I can best get back to mending a relationship after wronging someone after doing so.

I know that I will have a lifetime of apologies to give, and that’s ok! I want to model for Isla what it looks like to desire such a close relationship with her that I don’t want another minute to go by before I do my part to let her know I am sorry and that I don’t want to go on continuing to act that way towards her.

It’s a real thing for so many moms out there, and occasionally I let it get the best of me. I didn’t really get postpartum depression, but ever since becoming a mom 6 months ago, I’ve had my moments, and even days, where I feel overwhelmed and sad. These blues normally rear its ugly head more after Isla has had a couple rough nights in a row where she woke up about once every hour, leaving me exhausted and short tempered. I hate that I let lack of sleep affect me this way. I’m also more prone to be sad when I compare my daughter to the progress of other mom’s kids that I see talking about how well their kids sleep at night, how happy they always are, or all their new milestones that they are achieving. I’m supposed to be so happy for these moms and how awesome their kids are, but instead I’m feeling sorry for myself!

My husband is a saint you guys. He is my best friend and partner in this whole parenting adventure. When I’m feeling outside of my body in a sea of sadness, he reminds me that there is no set normal for every child. When Isla is being so friendly and happy, what a blessing! When she is being fussy and only wants mom or dad to hold her, what a blessing! When she hardly slept the night before, what a blessing! There are always reminders that our daughter is a wonderful gift that God entrusted us with. We have the honor and adventure of navigating her big personality and ups and downs that she experiences during the day.

Now this is not to say that if you have postpartum depression that you need to just change your perspective–that is something very different, and you definitely should seek help if that is what you are experiencing. In the same breath, it’s also ok to seek help if you feel like you need just a change in attitude or perspective. I feel like I need this on a daily basis. And 6 months later, I’m still working on making this a daily routine of embracing the dark under eye circles and thinning and brittle postpartum hair that are reminders that I have a beautiful and vibrant baby girl that I love with my entire being!

Thanks for joining me! My name is Taylor Heinz. I married the man of my dreams, Ross, on December 14, 2013, and this year, on April 17th, our first child Isla Nicole was born. Our lives have been changed for the better ever since! Becoming a mom has been such an adventure, and I’ve been writing down all the different things I experience along the way, so I decided to start a mommy blog to see if I can connect with other moms that might be going through something similar or are just needing encouragement to know you’re not alone! Please comment and share your mommy stories, and thanks for stopping by!

Isla Nicole Heinz 4.17.18